I received the following email from a student:
Hi Dr. Kirk, this is <disgruntled student>. I am a bit confused and, honestly a bit upset. My other team memebers stayed after class yesterday to speak with you about our <team research paper> and the grade we received. I was unable to stick around because I have a class right after yours and I had an exam to take. They informed me that you said we didn't seem prepared and it wasn't summarized well. I agree, we could have done a better job summarizing when we were done speaking, but I do not feel as though we seemed unprepared or deserve such a low grade on the assignment. We were extremely prepared and had that paper and project done at least a week before it was due. I know that other teams did much better on this assignment grade wise and (I am not trying to complain) but it didn't seem like the majority of the teams were more prepared or did that much better than we did to get a much better grade than we did. I wouldn't be upset if that wasn't such a large part of our grade, but since it is I am a bit upset.
I spent some time thinking about how to respond. I had already explained my grading on paper and in person and to continue the discussion would not have been productive. I finally decided not to email her back. I then received this following email from her:
Hi Dr. Kirk, this is <disgruntled student>.
This is a follow up I guess you would say from the e-mail I sent you last week. I wanted to apologize to you for that e-mail. I was a bit upset about the grade and tend to take things extremely personal, but I should have taken it as constructive criticism and learned to just do better next time. That is what I am going to do, I am going to try 100% harder to do better and impress you on the next project. I am extremely sorry for my rash behavior. I hope you can forgive me.
Jeremy Freese writes about a similar set of emails that he received from a student. Sometimes the best thing to do is nothing.

When my dean appointed me department chair, he gave me this advice: "You don't have to reply to a disgruntled faculty member immediately, either face-to-face or by e-mail. You can always say, 'I'll think about that and let you know.' It's one of the few real powers you have."
That turned out to be one of the most useful pieces of advice I've ever heard. Thanks, Delaney, for reminding me that it can apply to students as well.
Posted by: Kenneth W. Davis | May 27, 2007 at 04:41 PM
Thanks Ken. Great advice for all managers too!
Posted by: Delaney Kirk | May 27, 2007 at 05:27 PM
Let's face it, the e-mail it's the best thing in the world, now the old way of mailing things, are truly obsolete, the e-mail is way better than the old kind of mail, not just for their huge good & awesome new things, but, their technology, the easy way to use, and the ''world accesability'' thing, make the e-mail, the best communication way!!!
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